urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego noalterego noalterego 2007-06-04T04:11:07Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:4624 2007-06-04T04:11:07Z 2007-06-04T04:11:07Z i don't want to think of you anymore<br />cause this is BAD news.<br /><br /><br />balls balls. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:4476 2007-05-11T01:16:53Z 2007-05-11T01:16:53Z <p>I'm finally learning how to keep myself up everyday.&nbsp;<br />I'm learning how to stay from falling. For everyone.<br /><br />I'm finally learning how to be the person I want to be while being the person I am<br />Or maybe I'm learning how to accept the person I am as the person I want to be.</p> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:4320 2007-05-07T07:05:21Z 2007-05-08T01:44:00Z <p>The wind brushes you backwards <br />after 20 years you had hoped it would <br />Is it too late now or is it only getting dark out? <br /><br />You say her name like one would (Evan!) <br />Read the Bible each night before drifting off to sleep-- <br />To spring you heavenward <br /><br />But what is it about her <br />that makes all your synapses go crazy inside your brain? <br />What is it that makes you complain to me? <br /><br />You should be warned, flowers will change <br />And girls befriend snakes when they want their way <br />You should be told of Adam and Eve, <br />A girl will deceive if you give her and apple <br /><br />Keep in mind like heavy drinks <br />She's hard to keep down <br />Will you regret saying it too much to her tonight? <br /><br />When you wake up in shame, sweat beating off of your face, <br />Your stomach out of place, feel the cold tiles of the bathroom floor... <br /><br />Could you want it anymore? <br />Could you want it anymore? <br />Could you want it anymore? <br />Could you want it anymore? <br />Could you want her anymore....? </p> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:3874 2007-05-02T03:54:11Z 2007-05-02T03:59:40Z <p>I'm sorry your girlfriend broke up with you.<br />I'm sorry we lost touch.&nbsp;<br />I'm sorry I feel really creepy and obsessed with making you like me.<br />I'm sorry if i'm annoying.<br />I'm sorry for texting you and calling you.<br />I'm sorry if you think I party too much.<br /><br />I feel really weird.&nbsp;<br />I want to hang out with you soon.<br />I want to kiss you.&nbsp;<br />You call me and its really awkward and random.&nbsp;<br />I'm just being myself but I'm not the same as I was when you liked me.<br />I wonder if you remember that.&nbsp;<br />You're the only person who's actually REALLY liked me.<br />But I've changed. Do you like me now?<br /><br />"I'm trying to be brave 'cause when I'm brave other people feel brave but I feel like I'm heart is caving in."<br />Kimya Dawson.<br />Genius.&nbsp;<br />I want to hang out with Kimya. She honestly inspires me to be better.<br /><br /><br />I'm back to being the same old Shana.</p> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:3769 2007-04-27T03:19:08Z 2007-04-30T23:26:28Z <p>Solid matter is a myth - the universe is made up of vibrations.</p> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:3489 2007-04-25T03:08:19Z 2007-04-25T03:08:19Z There's no joy without the pain<br />It's the pain that makes us strong<br />But sometimes it's just so hard to carry on<br />When you said that you don't care<br />When you say that you'll be there<br />Well, I wonder just how did things go so wrong<br />With everything we've had<br />Oh please tell me<br />And you know it's just so sad<br />But who's to blame?<br /><br />I was mistaken<br />So who were you?<br />I thought I knew?<br />I guess I was mistaken<br />But I only wanted you<br />I&nbsp;was mistaken<br />So say goodbye<br />Don't tell me why<br />I guess I was mistaken<br /><br />I know I can't run to you again<br />Cuz'&nbsp; you would only run away<br />I guess there's nothing I can do to make you stay<br />You said that you would never leave<br />A lie you told and I believed<br />And now you want to go and throw this all away<br />So what is happening here?<br />Oh please tell me<br />It's exactly as I feared<br />You're just the same, and<br /><br />I was mistaken<br />So who were you?<br />I thought I knew?<br />I guess I was mistaken<br />But I only wanted you<br />I&nbsp;was mistaken<br />So say goodbye<br />Don't tell me why<br />I guess I was mistaken<br /><br />As I blame myself again<br />Wondering what I did<br />You tell me that you still might care for me<br />You say you're just confused<br />But that's really no excuse<br />You don't get sympathy<br />Cuz' I don't need this mindtrip,<br />I must be myself<br />Must free myself from you<br />And all you put me through<br /><br />I was mistaken<br />So who were you?<br />I thought I knew?<br />I guess I was mistaken<br />But I only wanted you<br />I&nbsp;was mistaken<br />So say goodbye<br />Don't tell me why<br />I guess I was mistaken<br /><br />Cuz' I only wanted you urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:3179 2007-04-24T06:03:17Z 2007-04-24T06:03:44Z I fall in love with almost everyone I meet. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:3018 2007-04-22T20:49:50Z 2007-04-22T20:49:50Z I am trying to be the kind stranger I've always wanted to meet. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:2766 2007-04-18T01:44:36Z 2007-04-18T01:44:36Z I have everything I need.&nbsp;<br />Yesterday went by so fast and was so random.<br />I didn't even care about anything yesterday.&nbsp;<br /><br />I was really happy.&nbsp;<br /><br />I am really happy.&nbsp;<br />I think all of us are happy inside but we don't realize it.<br />We all have the potential to feel the way I feel right now but we don't utilize it.<br />I used to see life as something I had to get through.<br />Now I don't see life as anything.&nbsp;<br />I just live it. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:2226 2007-04-14T19:12:56Z 2007-04-14T19:12:56Z sammie is really right about everything she says, just listen to her some day.<br /><br />jealousy is a terrible color on me but we all saw this coming.<br />I&nbsp;strongly believe the amount of love you give should be directly proportional to the amount of love you take<br />I know I am done taking your love.<br />So I'm done giving you my&nbsp;love. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:1751 2007-04-11T04:18:24Z 2007-04-11T04:18:24Z <p>i finally have a worthy secret for postsecret.com<br /><br /><br /><br />i'm very very excited.</p> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:1471 2007-04-10T22:39:03Z 2007-04-10T22:39:03Z i want you, not him.<br />but if you ain't giving&nbsp;<br />i'll get it somewhere else. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:1252 2007-04-09T23:23:54Z 2007-04-09T23:23:54Z <p>I don’t want to be rescued.<br />I don't want a knight in shining armor.<br />I’m not a princess or a queen.</p><p>"if you want to chill with me, it won't be in no palace."<br /></p><p>all I want is for someone to FIGHT for me.</p> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:noalterego:920 2007-04-08T07:52:29Z 2007-04-08T07:52:29Z Everyone is asleep and all I want is to talk to someone. Anyone. I was talking to three people but then they all left. Then I was talking to Brandon but he also left. Everyone leaves and I guess I could sleep but everything is so vivid right now, I don't want to miss any of it. <br /><br />music is so clear. i know excatly what they're saying. life is so full even though mine is completely empty. <br />my thoughts are so real, i want to share them. i want to go outside but its zero degrees and all I have is a pair of stripped gloves and a 50 dollar sweater.<br /><br />i want to shave my head. i want to start over completely and be reborn. hair is just hair. i want to redefine beauty. i want to prove i dont need my hair to be confident or beautiful. i would, i would right now if i was sober and if i thought my mother would ever look at me again. i really dont understand her deal but apparently she believes i would regret it really bad and hate myself. i think those decsions are up to me, not her. <br /><br />whatevs. <br /><br />theres too much pressure on my head. <br /><br />i seriously need something more than this right now.